Is the child really the father of man?

Is the child really the father of man?One of the biggest challenges most women face especially after marriage is – “How do I handle the children?” In true feminist form most young women initially rope in their husbands to help. But then, the children perhaps due to the umbilical cord connection do want to see more of their moms. Speaking to women who are unmarried, just married and moms of children, threw up a host of concerns and solutions of which some are captured here.

“When I conceived my first child I had very awful morning sickness. Both my boss and the organisation were very supportive. My real challenge happened when the baby came as I did not have a great support system to look after the baby. I decided then to move into a role which allowed me to work in a retainer mode from home. Yes it meant cutting off unwanted expenditure But in the long run it has paid off as my children – I have two of them now- are very comfortable and well balanced. I am now back at work as they are old enough to call me anytime. I have an elderly caring maid who is there when they get back home from school. I too ensure that I get back home to spend time with them in the evenings,” says Neeta Kameshwar who works with a design agency.

Gita Ramanathan’s version was quite different. “One thing that my children have taught and ingrained in me is PATIENCE. Not that I wasn’t before but children have made me more accommodative. The way they deal with situations and relationships has been very insightful. Many a time I have caught myself thinking like them and it has worked well for me. After all I too did not come with a graduation degree in parenting did I? I do know that as a child my parameters were quite different. I keep very close tabs on what is happening in the world around them, socially and culturally. This helps all of us to stay connected. From a full time career as a film executive I now have moved back into what I love to do – which is music and writing. Yes I too have had my share of woes – maids disappearing, a travelling husband, no support system and managing a home and a job. When I look back I am not very sure how I juggled all of this but being multiskilled, I was able to change tracks along with the flow of my life – interiors, radio jockeying and what not!” signs off this young woman who has just turned fifty.

The unmarried women vehemently said that they would get their husbands to baby sit and help. This too could come true. Organisations are changing as well. A lady who works with a large telecom company said that the day care centre run by her organisation does a great job and she takes along her child to work. Who knows, in the days to come there is still so much that we may end up learning from our children who seem ahead of us in technology and responsiveness.


- Gita Nair (views expressed in the article are that of the author)